Awakening

I grab my throat, but there’s nothing to tighten it

breath is panting.

I push air away from my body

-heavy-

Libs are pulsating

and palpitating.

I have to watch. I put into focus, but I can’t see.

I walk, I walk. In search of I don’t know what,

I desire. I run.

And I find: a yellow sea.

I pull even ground out

and I swallow every rose’s petal down.

I gulp down, bite after bite, but I don’t get satiated.

I throw up, in hope I can feel better.

But that was just the beginning.